Fresh blood spilled on the ground,
eyes darting all around.
Suspicions rose,
but bodies froze,
as ears rang from the sound.
With tensions running high,
none knowing truth from lie.
The smoking gun—
held by each one—
whispered in the air, “Goodbye.”
Photo credit: Neon Noir Smoking Gun Art Print by Etheloos on Etsy
Gargleblaster #156: Answer the question “Who dunnit?” in exactly 42 words.
i can smell discharge from the gun
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good poetry – gunfight?
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Thanks, Sue!! It’s intentionally left open to interpretation, but in my mind it speaks to the aftermath of a homicide, in which all the parties are looking for someone to blame, but they are also partially responsible themselves.
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I love a good mystery and this was mysterious
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Great job with the rhyming. I have never been able to do that!
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Fantastic! Makes me want to get moving on writing my own :)
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Yes! That grid is filling up fast! :)
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I know I just counted earlier and there was maybe four spots left. And nap time will be over soon…AAAAHHHHH.
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Great rhyming! Right here is where the stories and finger-pointing begin. Oh, and I love the image you chose to go with this.
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Oh my word. Rhyme, rhythm, story – all in 42 words.
So.Well.Done.
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Thank you, thank you!! This was a fun one.
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I liked your rhymes and story–you packed a lot in for such a small amount of words.
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Thanks, Mary! I liked yours as well – very unexpected. :)
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So lyrical.. i love it!
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I love the ‘suspicions rose/ but bodies froze’ line – it really speaks to the cerebral side of violent crime and emphasizes the blame and mistrust that is probably about to ensue. And great rhymes!
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Thanks, Kay!!
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Ooo, very nice! Something about the rhyming sing-song nature of this makes it even more spooky, in my opinion. Really cool response to the prompt. I loved it. Thanks for sharing it!
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Thanks, Christine!! Now that you mention it, it does have a ring-around-the-rosey creepiness to it. :)
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I love the way this carries you along almost cheerfully with the flow of the rhyming poetry in spite of the dark subject matter. I like the open endedness too. (Apparently endedness isn’t a word. My phone changed it to “open ended mess” which might have proved awkward. :0
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“Open ended mess” might be appropriate here too. :)
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Russian Roulette, perhaps? Who pulled that fatal trigger? Now I need to know. Argh!!
~Shailaja
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kudos for the rhyming, interesting and very good work.
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Love it.
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